CHAPTER 5 - I NEED A HOME 1995 Luke AFB Phx AZ
At this time in my life, I have been having many supernatural things happen all at once. My prayer had been for Gods will to be done in my life and I submitted to the Holy Spirit to take over my life. For the first time I was Shop Chief over 13 men in the Air Force. I really didn't like to play the political game that it took to be a shop chief, so they brought in a misfit MSgt and put him over me. He immediately started making sexual comments to me and I told God "look what he is doing, I will go to the President If I have to, just tell me what you want me to do." So I went home and opened my bible looking for an answer and He said "turn the other cheek." Oh my goodness, my flesh screamed out "no way", and I sure felt the flesh warring against the Spirit! As I submitted for the first time to the Holy Spirit, a job came open to be a dormitory manager and that MSgt said why don't you take it? And I thought to myself, no way I'm staying here to keep you on your toes. And again, I went home and asked God for His will; and not long after that, I took that position. I had to swallow my pride to take that job because normally they only put people in that position who could not fulfill their primary duty. But I felt God leading me, so I did.
Not long after being in the Dormitory Manager position, I hear God tell me, "get out of the Air Force, I am going to bless you." I sure wrestled with that word from God because military was all I knew. I even had a chance to get out early a year earlier and get a sixteen thousand dollar incentive and I passed it up. And now its time to reenlist, and God is telling me to get out. Wow it sure wasn't making any sense to me, but I know I heard God. I asked God to give me a word of knowledge to confirm He was speaking to me and the very next time I went to church, this man stands up and gives a person a word from God. And then he looks at me and says to me "because of your travailing and faithfulness, God is going to save your whole household and....God is going to bless you." Wow! I got my word. So I got out of the Air Force with a 5 year old daughter and only $100 to my name.
A week or so goes by and I ask God "okay Lord, what is next?" As I took a walk around the block one day, I see an 8x10 piece of paper on the ground that said in big black magic marker "I NEED A HOME." I picked it up, I knew it was from God to me; so I prayed Yes Lord I need a home, where do I go now? And in the middle of the night, He wakes me up and says "have a yard sale." So in the morning, I start to put things out in the driveway when three ladies pull up. They asked if there was more, I said its not all out yet and they said can we go in and look? And I let them in my house, and then more people were coming in and they were all asking how much, how much? Oh my goodness I had so many beautiful things, I had brought back lots of antique furniture and things from California. Even lots of antique dishes and nick nacks. I ended up having a yard sale for 4 months. Selling and giving away and throwing away all my things to follow God and have His perfect will in my life. His anointing was so strong on me again. I had several roman statues and other art forms of pagan gods in my house and when I would just walk past one of them, my skin would crawl. I would then take it out to my back yard and smash it to the ground. I had quite the pile going. And then there were other things that the Lord showed me had a hold on me because it was calling out to me "you better polish me or else, you better take care of me or else." And then other things He told me to get rid of because I loved it too much, more than Him. Everything had a spiritual significance. I would take my daughter to her preschool in the mornings and I would come back home and prayer walk. Walking and praying with my hands in the air praising and worshipping Him, I could hear him so well! And people were still coming from all over to come to my yard sale. While driving back home one day after dropping my daughter off at her school, I heard God tell me "I am making you a MOTHER OF MANY NATIONS." I cried because I knew I just heard Gods voice speak to me, but then I thought, but what does that mean?
While walking one morning God led me to this piece of land that was for sale. Nothing on it and it was being tilled and cleared. I walked that land claiming it for the kingdom of God and seeing visions of a God centered community all helping each other. Many times I went back and walked around it at Virginia and 63rd Ave. And I started feeling a cool breeze, like cool water around my legs and up to my knees. It was awesome when God told me that was His river flowing. Anyway that piece of land has a housing community on it now, so I cant wait to see what it will look like after Jesus comes back.
Later, God revealed to me that that piece of paper I found while walking that day that said "I NEED A HOME" was Gods love letter to me. Telling me HE NEEDED A HOME IN ME! He was cleaning this house to be a worthy habitation for HIS HOME IN ME. His dwelling place in me! He had to remove everything that was not of Him or from Him or things that had a hold on me or controlling me. Or things I loved more than Him. And the Holy Spirit did it all! One step at a time as I submitted to Him, He cleaned this house and moved in! Praise God!!!
Don't miss next chapter, still so much more to come. Follow me as I follow Him. Your Father is calling you!!!
Sunday, February 7, 2016
Saturday, February 6, 2016
CHAPTER 4 - I WANT TO LOVE THE WAY JESUS LOVES
CHAPTER 4 - I WANT TO LOVE THE WAY JESUS LOVES scroll down for chapter 1-3
At this point in my walk with the Holy Spirit of the Living God, I was finding out that Christians can be oppressed by demons. So I was praying that Gods anointing would come and break off every chain on me. I had learned that my daughters grandpa was a Pastor and her grandmas ministry was deliverance. And she had mailed me a little bit of literature about demonic oppression. So a little bit at a time God was teaching me how to be set free. I had Christian television on my T.V all the time, watching a lot of World Harvest Church at this time. Supernatural things started to happen to me; for example, while in my house I could see something moving out of the corner of my eye, like a small dark image; and every time I would turn to look at it, it would run. My daughter was only 5, I didn't want to scare her, so I didn't tell her about it. But one Saturday morning, she woke up before me and I said let me lay here for a while go play in your room. A few minutes later, she came back kind of skipping and jumped in bed. While looking at her toy she says "mommy, I keep seeing something and every time I try to look at it , it runs away." Well the hair on the back of my neck stood up and I knew it was a spirit now. It didn't do anything to me except scare me, so I just kept casting out the spirit of fear. And after a while I did not see it any more.
I had heard of a woman at church that had a ministry in deliverance so I started going to her bible studies at night at her house. She immediately laid her hands on me when I walked in and she prophesied over me. As she did to everyone else. I had never experienced that before, but I was willing to stay and see what God was doing. The next time I went, she prophesied over a married couple and told them that they were going to get to know the devil real well...oh real well! I was new to all this supernatural stuff but what she was doing seemed to be different from everything else God was doing in my life. Another time I went and we were raising our hands in a circle with worship music on praising God, when she abruptly and loudly started yelling at the devil to leave and get out.
Several times after going to her house, I would go home and ask God "what was that, was that you?" And He was showing me all about the spirit of Jezebel. Several times in row I asked Him "what was that, was that you?" And same thing, He just kept showing me about Jezebel. I started to write more about what she was doing, but I do not want to give you fear, like she was doing to those people. Just know that this spirit of Jezebel is manipulating, dominating, and intimidating. It is witchcraft! And God hates witchcraft! As the Elijah generation is raised up in power to restore all things before the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Jezebel spirit will and is raising her ugly head in opposition. Just as Elijah had to overcome her we will have to do the same. She is the false prophet who causes a big scene as soon as the real King is brought out. She tears her clothes and screams "treason, treason, you are the false king." She hates the true prophets of God who can spot her a mile away. She is relentless and ruthless in trying to kill all of Gods prophets. Read book by Steve Sampson called "Confronting Jezebel -Discerning and Defeating the Spirit of Control."
At this time, I was praying that I wanted to love, to love the way Jesus loves, I remember going to the altar several times asking this lay pastor to help me pray that I can love the way Jesus loves. And he prayed "God love her." And I thought that's not what I asked him to pray. He would say that every time I asked him to help me pray. I liked this lay pastor, he started teaching a class in the mornings before church started. It was on child abuse. While attending his class he taught about the different kinds of child abuse. One thing he said was that emotional abuse was child abuse, and I immediately felt liberated to know that some one else knew what I had been feeling for years. I knew I was abused but I couldn't prove it or knew what to call it. He also taught on generational curses, and how we can pass these things on to our children and their children. So I started praying, "Lord please don't let me pass on any generational curses to my daughter and show me how to be a good mommy."
Now I learn that some one else at church is having a bible study at their house. So I start going on Wednesday nights. This particular Wednesday night, I was saying goodbye almost out the door, when my daughter, 5 at the time, was tugging on my shirt. She said "mommy tell them you need prayer" and I said what for honey? And she didn't answer me. So I continue to say bye and she tugs on my shirt again "mommy, tell them you need prayer." And again I ask, what for honey? Still no answer. So I tell them my daughter says I need prayer, and the only thing I can think of is I've been praying that I don't throw any generational curses on her. So they gather around me and lay hands on me and pray. And then we went home. I just want to make sure everyone knows that my daughter was always a good little girl, no tantrums or violent behavior. After we got home, I started to do the dishes and Amanda sat in the middle of the kitchen floor and said "mommy, I want a miracle." I said, you do? well just ask God! He can do it." And she says again, in a more demanding voice, I want a miracle! And I said well tell me what you want and I will help you pray. Still she wont tell me, so I keep washing dishes. Next time she says it she was getting angry. And I turned and said cut it out, it was 9:00 at night so I thought she was just cranky and tired. I continue doing dishes and I turned back and she was not there. So I went in the living room looking for her and she was curled up in a ball in a corner shaking. I said "what's wrong come here" and she screams at me and says "no, get away!" And I said" honey, what did I do, you have to tell mommy so I can say sorry." And I bent down to pick her up and she screams no get away and her face turns flush; so I backed away from her. At this point, I start pacing the floor praying, "God what is going on, what did I do?' And she gets up and says "you don't love me, I'm running away" and she tries to run out of the house at 9:00 at night. I catch her and hold on to her while she is kicking me and trying to bite me. My daughter has never acted out like this ever! So I put her down and she looks at me with these eyes that I have never seen before and says "I'm lonely." The hair on the back of my neck stood up and then I knew that this was a spiritual battle! I knew it because even if my daughter was lonely, she wouldn't know what to call it. So I'm trying to remember everything the Holy Spirit has been teaching about demons. And I'm trying to remember everything that was manifesting through her while she was acting out. So without yelling at her, I just said, "IN THE NAME OF JESUS, I COMMAND THAT SPIRIT OF ANGER TO LEAVE YOU, GET OUT." And just like you would see in a movie, she holds her ears and screams no! And I just kept casting out in the NAME OF JESUS, I command the spirits of anger, fear, rejection and lonliness to leave get out! And she fell down weeping and I lay down with her and cried. We knew we had just been through something very spiritual!
Praise God! He hears our prayers and the very intentions of our heart. I want to love the way Jesus loves, and to be a good mommy and to not pass on any generational curses to my daughter. And He set us free!!! And as I learned to trust Him, I allowed Him to LOVE ME FIRST...So I could love...the way He loves. He had to show me how, by first RECEIVING HIS LOVE.
Open your heart and let Him come in, to LOVE YOU...SO YOU CAN LOVE!!
At this point in my walk with the Holy Spirit of the Living God, I was finding out that Christians can be oppressed by demons. So I was praying that Gods anointing would come and break off every chain on me. I had learned that my daughters grandpa was a Pastor and her grandmas ministry was deliverance. And she had mailed me a little bit of literature about demonic oppression. So a little bit at a time God was teaching me how to be set free. I had Christian television on my T.V all the time, watching a lot of World Harvest Church at this time. Supernatural things started to happen to me; for example, while in my house I could see something moving out of the corner of my eye, like a small dark image; and every time I would turn to look at it, it would run. My daughter was only 5, I didn't want to scare her, so I didn't tell her about it. But one Saturday morning, she woke up before me and I said let me lay here for a while go play in your room. A few minutes later, she came back kind of skipping and jumped in bed. While looking at her toy she says "mommy, I keep seeing something and every time I try to look at it , it runs away." Well the hair on the back of my neck stood up and I knew it was a spirit now. It didn't do anything to me except scare me, so I just kept casting out the spirit of fear. And after a while I did not see it any more.
I had heard of a woman at church that had a ministry in deliverance so I started going to her bible studies at night at her house. She immediately laid her hands on me when I walked in and she prophesied over me. As she did to everyone else. I had never experienced that before, but I was willing to stay and see what God was doing. The next time I went, she prophesied over a married couple and told them that they were going to get to know the devil real well...oh real well! I was new to all this supernatural stuff but what she was doing seemed to be different from everything else God was doing in my life. Another time I went and we were raising our hands in a circle with worship music on praising God, when she abruptly and loudly started yelling at the devil to leave and get out.
Several times after going to her house, I would go home and ask God "what was that, was that you?" And He was showing me all about the spirit of Jezebel. Several times in row I asked Him "what was that, was that you?" And same thing, He just kept showing me about Jezebel. I started to write more about what she was doing, but I do not want to give you fear, like she was doing to those people. Just know that this spirit of Jezebel is manipulating, dominating, and intimidating. It is witchcraft! And God hates witchcraft! As the Elijah generation is raised up in power to restore all things before the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Jezebel spirit will and is raising her ugly head in opposition. Just as Elijah had to overcome her we will have to do the same. She is the false prophet who causes a big scene as soon as the real King is brought out. She tears her clothes and screams "treason, treason, you are the false king." She hates the true prophets of God who can spot her a mile away. She is relentless and ruthless in trying to kill all of Gods prophets. Read book by Steve Sampson called "Confronting Jezebel -Discerning and Defeating the Spirit of Control."
At this time, I was praying that I wanted to love, to love the way Jesus loves, I remember going to the altar several times asking this lay pastor to help me pray that I can love the way Jesus loves. And he prayed "God love her." And I thought that's not what I asked him to pray. He would say that every time I asked him to help me pray. I liked this lay pastor, he started teaching a class in the mornings before church started. It was on child abuse. While attending his class he taught about the different kinds of child abuse. One thing he said was that emotional abuse was child abuse, and I immediately felt liberated to know that some one else knew what I had been feeling for years. I knew I was abused but I couldn't prove it or knew what to call it. He also taught on generational curses, and how we can pass these things on to our children and their children. So I started praying, "Lord please don't let me pass on any generational curses to my daughter and show me how to be a good mommy."
Now I learn that some one else at church is having a bible study at their house. So I start going on Wednesday nights. This particular Wednesday night, I was saying goodbye almost out the door, when my daughter, 5 at the time, was tugging on my shirt. She said "mommy tell them you need prayer" and I said what for honey? And she didn't answer me. So I continue to say bye and she tugs on my shirt again "mommy, tell them you need prayer." And again I ask, what for honey? Still no answer. So I tell them my daughter says I need prayer, and the only thing I can think of is I've been praying that I don't throw any generational curses on her. So they gather around me and lay hands on me and pray. And then we went home. I just want to make sure everyone knows that my daughter was always a good little girl, no tantrums or violent behavior. After we got home, I started to do the dishes and Amanda sat in the middle of the kitchen floor and said "mommy, I want a miracle." I said, you do? well just ask God! He can do it." And she says again, in a more demanding voice, I want a miracle! And I said well tell me what you want and I will help you pray. Still she wont tell me, so I keep washing dishes. Next time she says it she was getting angry. And I turned and said cut it out, it was 9:00 at night so I thought she was just cranky and tired. I continue doing dishes and I turned back and she was not there. So I went in the living room looking for her and she was curled up in a ball in a corner shaking. I said "what's wrong come here" and she screams at me and says "no, get away!" And I said" honey, what did I do, you have to tell mommy so I can say sorry." And I bent down to pick her up and she screams no get away and her face turns flush; so I backed away from her. At this point, I start pacing the floor praying, "God what is going on, what did I do?' And she gets up and says "you don't love me, I'm running away" and she tries to run out of the house at 9:00 at night. I catch her and hold on to her while she is kicking me and trying to bite me. My daughter has never acted out like this ever! So I put her down and she looks at me with these eyes that I have never seen before and says "I'm lonely." The hair on the back of my neck stood up and then I knew that this was a spiritual battle! I knew it because even if my daughter was lonely, she wouldn't know what to call it. So I'm trying to remember everything the Holy Spirit has been teaching about demons. And I'm trying to remember everything that was manifesting through her while she was acting out. So without yelling at her, I just said, "IN THE NAME OF JESUS, I COMMAND THAT SPIRIT OF ANGER TO LEAVE YOU, GET OUT." And just like you would see in a movie, she holds her ears and screams no! And I just kept casting out in the NAME OF JESUS, I command the spirits of anger, fear, rejection and lonliness to leave get out! And she fell down weeping and I lay down with her and cried. We knew we had just been through something very spiritual!
Praise God! He hears our prayers and the very intentions of our heart. I want to love the way Jesus loves, and to be a good mommy and to not pass on any generational curses to my daughter. And He set us free!!! And as I learned to trust Him, I allowed Him to LOVE ME FIRST...So I could love...the way He loves. He had to show me how, by first RECEIVING HIS LOVE.
Open your heart and let Him come in, to LOVE YOU...SO YOU CAN LOVE!!
Friday, February 5, 2016
CHAPTER 3 - WHO TOLD YOU THAT YOU WERE NAKED?
Chapter 3 - Year 1995 - Phoenix - Luke AFB
After attending this Assembly of God Church for about a month the Pastor while preaching said that God is saying "His people need to repent so they can be restored." I was so relieved that someone else could hear God! And then I thought, I better go repent. I had already repented of everything I knew of but I knew for sure God was speaking. So I went down to the altar and kneeled down and prayed a generic prayer of "God I'm sorry for putting my family before you, I'm sorry for putting my work before you, I'm sorry for putting my money before you"; and I fell over. Past out, and when I came to; I was manifesting. I could see what my body was doing, but I couldn't stop it. I was laying there and breathing very heavy and loud and then abruptly sit up and gasp, as in a great fear. This happened over and over. The Pastor and his lay pastors were putting oil on my head and trying to cast out the devil. I thought I was possessed too because I could see what was happening and couldn't stop it. Until one woman heard from God and said "Laurie, what is God showing you?" And I said "well the only thing I can think of is when my daughter was little, she peed the bed and I spanked her." I guess I had guilt for that, but there it went! That was just the beginning of the Holy Spirit bringing up one thing after the other of what I needed to repent of. I would say something and the woman would say Lord forgive her for that. They were things that happened even before I was saved, would have never thought they were an issue in my life. One thing the Holy Spirit brought out was an ungodly thought that I had for maybe three seconds that was even before I was saved. AND HE SHOWED ME A LITTLE GIRL IN A RED DRESS STANDING BY A DOOR THAT WAS ONLY OPEN A COUPLE INCHES. These were all my deep dark secrets that I would not tell anyone! And here I was on the floor, under the power of the Holy Spirit, couldn't get up if I wanted to, and I'm confessing them to these people I had just met. After confessing all these things, I got zapped with electricity. Started in my feet and rolled up my whole body. For weeks afterward, my arms and hands were tingling as if I had been shocked with electricity. After 2 1/2 hours on the floor, 10:30 at night, the pastor says well I don't know what else to do for you, can you drive home? And I said "I think so." I didn't sleep well at all, I could still feel this power all over me. The next morning, I get my uniform on to go to Luke AFB to work. I took my daughter to her preschool at SKYWAY Christian School and dropped her off at her classroom, and then stepped into the office and started telling one of the ladies what had happened the night before at my church. Every time I tried to tell her what happened, I couldn't speak, just travailing was coming out of my mouth! So she went and told her pastor what was going on, he must have called the other pastor from my church because he knew exactly what to ask me.
After taking me to their sanctuary, the pastor asks me "LAURIE, WHAT IS GOD SHOWING YOU?" And sure enough, I wasn't finished. There was a few more things God wanted to cleanse me of.
Wow, God is so awesome! I thought I was already good, had quit everything I knew how to quit when He told me to repent. He even wants to cleanse our conscience of the guilt and shame that came in from sinning. He loves us so much. He is calling us to repentance so we can be made whole! He knows the very intentions of our heart.
Genesis 3 - Now the serpent was more crafty than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, has God said, you shall not eat of every tree of the garden? 2 And the woman said unto the serpent, we may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden; 3 but of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God has said, you shall not eat of it, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.
In genesis 3 you can read how they both ate of the tree and then their eyes were opened and then they knew that they were naked. They heard the voice of God walking in the garden in the cool of the day and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God. And God called Adam and said, "WHERE ARE YOU?" And he said, I heard your voice in the garden, and I WAS AFRAID, BECAUSE I WAS NAKED, AND I HID MYSELF. And he said, WHO TOLD YOU THAT YOU WERE NAKED? Have you eaten from the tree that I told you not to eat of?
Still so much more to come. Please follow along with me so we can experience God together! He is doing wonders among His people.
After attending this Assembly of God Church for about a month the Pastor while preaching said that God is saying "His people need to repent so they can be restored." I was so relieved that someone else could hear God! And then I thought, I better go repent. I had already repented of everything I knew of but I knew for sure God was speaking. So I went down to the altar and kneeled down and prayed a generic prayer of "God I'm sorry for putting my family before you, I'm sorry for putting my work before you, I'm sorry for putting my money before you"; and I fell over. Past out, and when I came to; I was manifesting. I could see what my body was doing, but I couldn't stop it. I was laying there and breathing very heavy and loud and then abruptly sit up and gasp, as in a great fear. This happened over and over. The Pastor and his lay pastors were putting oil on my head and trying to cast out the devil. I thought I was possessed too because I could see what was happening and couldn't stop it. Until one woman heard from God and said "Laurie, what is God showing you?" And I said "well the only thing I can think of is when my daughter was little, she peed the bed and I spanked her." I guess I had guilt for that, but there it went! That was just the beginning of the Holy Spirit bringing up one thing after the other of what I needed to repent of. I would say something and the woman would say Lord forgive her for that. They were things that happened even before I was saved, would have never thought they were an issue in my life. One thing the Holy Spirit brought out was an ungodly thought that I had for maybe three seconds that was even before I was saved. AND HE SHOWED ME A LITTLE GIRL IN A RED DRESS STANDING BY A DOOR THAT WAS ONLY OPEN A COUPLE INCHES. These were all my deep dark secrets that I would not tell anyone! And here I was on the floor, under the power of the Holy Spirit, couldn't get up if I wanted to, and I'm confessing them to these people I had just met. After confessing all these things, I got zapped with electricity. Started in my feet and rolled up my whole body. For weeks afterward, my arms and hands were tingling as if I had been shocked with electricity. After 2 1/2 hours on the floor, 10:30 at night, the pastor says well I don't know what else to do for you, can you drive home? And I said "I think so." I didn't sleep well at all, I could still feel this power all over me. The next morning, I get my uniform on to go to Luke AFB to work. I took my daughter to her preschool at SKYWAY Christian School and dropped her off at her classroom, and then stepped into the office and started telling one of the ladies what had happened the night before at my church. Every time I tried to tell her what happened, I couldn't speak, just travailing was coming out of my mouth! So she went and told her pastor what was going on, he must have called the other pastor from my church because he knew exactly what to ask me.
After taking me to their sanctuary, the pastor asks me "LAURIE, WHAT IS GOD SHOWING YOU?" And sure enough, I wasn't finished. There was a few more things God wanted to cleanse me of.
Wow, God is so awesome! I thought I was already good, had quit everything I knew how to quit when He told me to repent. He even wants to cleanse our conscience of the guilt and shame that came in from sinning. He loves us so much. He is calling us to repentance so we can be made whole! He knows the very intentions of our heart.
Genesis 3 - Now the serpent was more crafty than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, has God said, you shall not eat of every tree of the garden? 2 And the woman said unto the serpent, we may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden; 3 but of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God has said, you shall not eat of it, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.
In genesis 3 you can read how they both ate of the tree and then their eyes were opened and then they knew that they were naked. They heard the voice of God walking in the garden in the cool of the day and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God. And God called Adam and said, "WHERE ARE YOU?" And he said, I heard your voice in the garden, and I WAS AFRAID, BECAUSE I WAS NAKED, AND I HID MYSELF. And he said, WHO TOLD YOU THAT YOU WERE NAKED? Have you eaten from the tree that I told you not to eat of?
Still so much more to come. Please follow along with me so we can experience God together! He is doing wonders among His people.
Thursday, February 4, 2016
CHAPTER 2 - MY PEOPLE NEED TO REPENT SO THEY CAN BE RESTORED
Chapter 2
MY PEOPLE NEED TO REPENT SO THEY CAN BE RESTORED
Still living in Phoenix, going to church and praising God for what He has done in our life so far. I was still going to the Weslyan Church down the road and falling in love with Jesus more everyday. The more I fell in love with Him, the more things in my life were changing. I quit smoking, drinking alcohol, going to clubs, ungodly relationships and cussing. I loved God and the people at my church. I started going to a bible study at church called "Experiencing God" by Henry Blackaby, it was wonderful. God used it in a very powerful way to show me how to follow His Holy Spirit.
All was well, I THOUGHT. Until I heard Gods voice for the first time in my relationship with Him. He said "My people need to repent so they can be restored." I was in awe that I heard His voice. I went all around church telling my friends "you know what God said, He said His people need to repent so they can be restored." Every time I would share it, I would get a response like "well what do I need to repent of?" I had already been saved for 5 years and quit everything I knew how to quit when I heard His voice. So I just kept sharing what I had heard and people at church started treating me badly, even the Pastor made a comment of me being crazy because I am hearing voices. I got such an awesome revelation though as I was in my experiencing God bible study class. It taught that whenever God gets ready to do something, He always reveals to a person or His people what He is going to do. God accomplishes His work through His people. (see Amos 3:7) "Surely the Sovereign Lord does nothing without revealing His plan to his servants the prophets".
After being greatly misunderstood by my church who I loved so much, I found myself standing up in the congregation while open prayer was going on; and I said "INSTEAD OF ME COMING TO CHURCH WANTING YOU TO FILL MY CUP, I WILL POUR MYSELF OUT FOR YOU." I will never forget that statement, it was the beginning of my life following the Holy Spirit and doing His work. I ended up leaving that church, weeping as I walked home with my daughter; feeling betrayed by my church family. I knew God was changing me to be GOD CENTERED and not people centered. It was hard, but that's what I wanted. I started praying, okay God what's next, where do you want me to go.
At this time, my daughter was attending a preschool at Skyway Church. While I was dropping her off there one morning, I was sharing with another mother and she invited me to her church, an assembly of God church. I felt God leading me to her church and so I went. When I got there, they were having a revival and going even in the evenings to listen to an evangelist speak. After about the third time going, this particular evening I was having bad back cramps and didn't know why. I even had a peculiar passing of which looked like a mucous plug of a woman about to give birth. The Pastor of this Assembly of God Church had gone to the Brownsville Revival in Pensecola Fl. and the evangelist speaking was also from that revival, Steve Hill. While I was seated pretty far in the back of church on the end seat, they showed a film clip from the revival of Alison Ward speaking with John Kilpatrick the Pastor of the Revival (SEE ALISON WARD BROWNSVILLE REVIVAL). She was saying everything God was showing me already. About Gods people not listening to Him. And when she said there is not much time, that Gods heart is grieving for us...I flew out of my chair screaming "praise Jesus" and landed on the floor in a prostrate position wailing and weeping; so loud and so long. I didn't even know my lungs could do that because I had smoked cigarettes for so long. It was so loud, he could not preach, he did an altar call for people to come forward and accept Jesus as Lord. When I got up, the woman next to me said what was that? I said "I don't know, it wasn't me." She said it sounds like travailing. I had never heard that before so when I got home, I looked in my bible and bible dictionary and sure enough, its in many places in Gods word. Matthew 24:4-8 Jesus said Take heed that no man deceive you. For many shall come in my name saying, I am Christ; and shall deceive many. And you shall hear of wars and rumors of wars; see that you be not troubled; for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet. For nation shall rise against nation and kingdom against kingdom; and there shall be famines and pestilences and earthquakes, in diverse places. ALL THESE ARE THE BEGINNING OF SORROWS. In the olden days, when a woman was going into labor, they would say she is going into her sorrows. God also gave me Isaiah 54. I love this scripture, He used it to call me out. "Shout for joy, O barren one, you who have born no child; break forth into joyful shouting and cry aloud, you who have not TRAVAILED; For the sons of the desolate one will be more numerous than the sons of the married woman," says the Lord. 52:2 "Enlarge the place of your tent; stretch out the curtains of your dwellings, spare not; lengthen your cords, and strengthen your pegs. 3- "For you will spread abroad to the right and to the left. And your descendants will possess nations, And they will resettle the desolate cities. 4- "Fear not, for you will not be put to shame; Neither feel humiliated, for you will not be disgraced; but you will forget the shame of your youth, and the reproach of your widowhood you will remember no more. 5- "For your husband is your Maker, Whose name is the Lord of hosts; And your redeemer is the Holy One of Israel, who is called the God of all the earth. Let those who have ears to hear...HEAR WHAT THE SPIRIT OF THE LORD IS SAYING!
Still so much more to say. Stay with me. YOU CAN DO THIS ...KINGS OF PEOPLE SHALL COME OUT OF ME. Follow me as I follow our Father God.
MY PEOPLE NEED TO REPENT SO THEY CAN BE RESTORED
Still living in Phoenix, going to church and praising God for what He has done in our life so far. I was still going to the Weslyan Church down the road and falling in love with Jesus more everyday. The more I fell in love with Him, the more things in my life were changing. I quit smoking, drinking alcohol, going to clubs, ungodly relationships and cussing. I loved God and the people at my church. I started going to a bible study at church called "Experiencing God" by Henry Blackaby, it was wonderful. God used it in a very powerful way to show me how to follow His Holy Spirit.
All was well, I THOUGHT. Until I heard Gods voice for the first time in my relationship with Him. He said "My people need to repent so they can be restored." I was in awe that I heard His voice. I went all around church telling my friends "you know what God said, He said His people need to repent so they can be restored." Every time I would share it, I would get a response like "well what do I need to repent of?" I had already been saved for 5 years and quit everything I knew how to quit when I heard His voice. So I just kept sharing what I had heard and people at church started treating me badly, even the Pastor made a comment of me being crazy because I am hearing voices. I got such an awesome revelation though as I was in my experiencing God bible study class. It taught that whenever God gets ready to do something, He always reveals to a person or His people what He is going to do. God accomplishes His work through His people. (see Amos 3:7) "Surely the Sovereign Lord does nothing without revealing His plan to his servants the prophets".
After being greatly misunderstood by my church who I loved so much, I found myself standing up in the congregation while open prayer was going on; and I said "INSTEAD OF ME COMING TO CHURCH WANTING YOU TO FILL MY CUP, I WILL POUR MYSELF OUT FOR YOU." I will never forget that statement, it was the beginning of my life following the Holy Spirit and doing His work. I ended up leaving that church, weeping as I walked home with my daughter; feeling betrayed by my church family. I knew God was changing me to be GOD CENTERED and not people centered. It was hard, but that's what I wanted. I started praying, okay God what's next, where do you want me to go.
At this time, my daughter was attending a preschool at Skyway Church. While I was dropping her off there one morning, I was sharing with another mother and she invited me to her church, an assembly of God church. I felt God leading me to her church and so I went. When I got there, they were having a revival and going even in the evenings to listen to an evangelist speak. After about the third time going, this particular evening I was having bad back cramps and didn't know why. I even had a peculiar passing of which looked like a mucous plug of a woman about to give birth. The Pastor of this Assembly of God Church had gone to the Brownsville Revival in Pensecola Fl. and the evangelist speaking was also from that revival, Steve Hill. While I was seated pretty far in the back of church on the end seat, they showed a film clip from the revival of Alison Ward speaking with John Kilpatrick the Pastor of the Revival (SEE ALISON WARD BROWNSVILLE REVIVAL). She was saying everything God was showing me already. About Gods people not listening to Him. And when she said there is not much time, that Gods heart is grieving for us...I flew out of my chair screaming "praise Jesus" and landed on the floor in a prostrate position wailing and weeping; so loud and so long. I didn't even know my lungs could do that because I had smoked cigarettes for so long. It was so loud, he could not preach, he did an altar call for people to come forward and accept Jesus as Lord. When I got up, the woman next to me said what was that? I said "I don't know, it wasn't me." She said it sounds like travailing. I had never heard that before so when I got home, I looked in my bible and bible dictionary and sure enough, its in many places in Gods word. Matthew 24:4-8 Jesus said Take heed that no man deceive you. For many shall come in my name saying, I am Christ; and shall deceive many. And you shall hear of wars and rumors of wars; see that you be not troubled; for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet. For nation shall rise against nation and kingdom against kingdom; and there shall be famines and pestilences and earthquakes, in diverse places. ALL THESE ARE THE BEGINNING OF SORROWS. In the olden days, when a woman was going into labor, they would say she is going into her sorrows. God also gave me Isaiah 54. I love this scripture, He used it to call me out. "Shout for joy, O barren one, you who have born no child; break forth into joyful shouting and cry aloud, you who have not TRAVAILED; For the sons of the desolate one will be more numerous than the sons of the married woman," says the Lord. 52:2 "Enlarge the place of your tent; stretch out the curtains of your dwellings, spare not; lengthen your cords, and strengthen your pegs. 3- "For you will spread abroad to the right and to the left. And your descendants will possess nations, And they will resettle the desolate cities. 4- "Fear not, for you will not be put to shame; Neither feel humiliated, for you will not be disgraced; but you will forget the shame of your youth, and the reproach of your widowhood you will remember no more. 5- "For your husband is your Maker, Whose name is the Lord of hosts; And your redeemer is the Holy One of Israel, who is called the God of all the earth. Let those who have ears to hear...HEAR WHAT THE SPIRIT OF THE LORD IS SAYING!
Still so much more to say. Stay with me. YOU CAN DO THIS ...KINGS OF PEOPLE SHALL COME OUT OF ME. Follow me as I follow our Father God.
Wednesday, February 3, 2016
CHAPTER 1 - FINDING THE FATHER
Chapter 1 - A HOLE IN YOUR HEART
I am writing this story about myself, Laurie Ann Carlisle; middle child of Billy and Joann Carlisle. My siblings are Lisa three years older sister and Keith three years younger brother. My father was in the United States Army and mom was homemaker and later town clerk for Huachuca City Az for 19 years. My family arrived in Sierra Vista Az in 1974 and my father retired here in 1976.
My first job at age 16 was in a mens' clothing store called Pant Palace. I will never forget it, I loved that job. There was a womens' clothing store right next door and we would take turns going over there and spend all our money. At age 21, I realized that I could not make enough money in this small city to live on my own; so I went in the United States Air Force in 1985. My first duty station was Norton Air Force Base in San Bernardino Ca. After sowing my oats for several years, 26 years old, and still not married; I said to myself "If I don't get married soon, I am just going to have a baby." And not long after that I spotted this very handsome man in the club and we started a relationship. I fell head over heels in love and got pregnant after only about three months of dating. I told him right away I was pregnant and it just seemed we drifted apart with not much in common. He was very much into his art, of which he was very successful selling his many beautiful sculptures.
Well there I was fully pregnant, at work in my uniform, packing life preservers when my supervisor at that time TSgt Frank Clark, was sitting next to me telling me about Jesus. And I in a very sarcastic voice I said "you know what, I am not even listening to you." And he said "okay, no problem." I was raised Catholic (kinda sorta) and all I knew about God or Jesus at that time was how Jesus looked in a picture and how to dip my finger in holy water and put it on my forehead; and kneel down at pew. I was playing poker with some friends when I went into labor. My neighbor friends Debbie Knudsen and her sister inlaw were pregnant also and they were the ones I asked to drive me to the hospital.
After I had my beautiful daughter Amanda, the doctor said before you can even take her home; you have to take her to see a cardiologist because she has a large hole in her heart. A VSD heart murmur. So I did and they told me what to look and watch for warning signs of heart trouble. Wow, I felt so all alone. Like no one knew how I was feeling. Scared, confused and alone. At three months old, Amanda went into congestive heart failure and had to be put on medicines to clear fluid out of her lungs. She then soon became underweight because she wouldn't suck very long before she got real tired. The cardiologist told me that if she doesn't gain weight soon, she has a 90 percent chance of having open heart surgery. Her dad was very kind and helped us with her medical bills.
I felt hopeless and started looking for God. I remembered my supervisor, Frank Clark telling me about Jesus. So I called him and said " I just want to go to church, and I was told Roman Catholic church was the only real church; is that true?" And he said Laurie its something you do in your heart, not in a building." And then he prayed with me on the phone and I asked Jesus in my heart and to be Lord of my life. I got saved in November of 1990. So awesome when I think about it now, how God used my daughter to save me and bring me into a relationship with him. And she NEVER needed the heart surgery. As I kept seeking God, she kept getting better and better! When Frank and I would get a 15 minute break at work, he would read the bible and a little book called My Daily Bread. He is a southern Baptist and he and his wife Linda brought me to church with them. They took me under their wings and mentored me in the Lord for about 3 years until Norton AFB closed and we both got transferred to different stations. It was pretty scarey leaving my friend and mentor. Felt like God let go of my hand. So thankful that they have always kept in touch with me, even till this day. They have been that steady rock in my life, always there and always the same. Love them so much. He has sent me countless books, CDs, literature and gifts. And has always been there to encourage me.
My new station was Luke AFB in Phoenix AZ, we got there in 1993. Amanda had seen her father several times before we left California and I took several pictures of him holding her. But I honestly thought that we would never see him again. I began attending a Weslyan Methodist Church down the street from me and my daughter had several friends in our neighborhood. All was well; I thought. Until one day sometime before Christmas, Amanda asks me for a dad for Christmas. Broke my heart. We had not seen or spoke to her dad since we left California and she was just an infant so I thought she wouldn't even notice him not around. So when I went to church the next time, I asked the women in my group to help me pray that somehow my daughter could have a relationship with her dad. So at this time, I believe she was about 4 1/2 years old. Not long after we prayed at church, a master sergeant at work asked me out to lunch. Not someone I was interested in but I thought it was a free meal anyway. So we were eating at the Sonic when he asked me about my daughters dad. I told him a little bit about him and then he said "I knew him, I grew up with him". So that man went home that evening and must have called her dads family, miles away even, and told them about Amanda. Shortly thereafter, her dad was flying out (in his own private plane) and visiting Amanda. And we made trips to California for her to meet her other grandparents and her half sister. They were all so welcoming and made Amanda feel so special! Her dad has been a part of her life ever since, and even came to Arizona to walk her down the isle when she got married. God is so awesome!
I am writing this story about myself, Laurie Ann Carlisle; middle child of Billy and Joann Carlisle. My siblings are Lisa three years older sister and Keith three years younger brother. My father was in the United States Army and mom was homemaker and later town clerk for Huachuca City Az for 19 years. My family arrived in Sierra Vista Az in 1974 and my father retired here in 1976.
My first job at age 16 was in a mens' clothing store called Pant Palace. I will never forget it, I loved that job. There was a womens' clothing store right next door and we would take turns going over there and spend all our money. At age 21, I realized that I could not make enough money in this small city to live on my own; so I went in the United States Air Force in 1985. My first duty station was Norton Air Force Base in San Bernardino Ca. After sowing my oats for several years, 26 years old, and still not married; I said to myself "If I don't get married soon, I am just going to have a baby." And not long after that I spotted this very handsome man in the club and we started a relationship. I fell head over heels in love and got pregnant after only about three months of dating. I told him right away I was pregnant and it just seemed we drifted apart with not much in common. He was very much into his art, of which he was very successful selling his many beautiful sculptures.
Well there I was fully pregnant, at work in my uniform, packing life preservers when my supervisor at that time TSgt Frank Clark, was sitting next to me telling me about Jesus. And I in a very sarcastic voice I said "you know what, I am not even listening to you." And he said "okay, no problem." I was raised Catholic (kinda sorta) and all I knew about God or Jesus at that time was how Jesus looked in a picture and how to dip my finger in holy water and put it on my forehead; and kneel down at pew. I was playing poker with some friends when I went into labor. My neighbor friends Debbie Knudsen and her sister inlaw were pregnant also and they were the ones I asked to drive me to the hospital.
After I had my beautiful daughter Amanda, the doctor said before you can even take her home; you have to take her to see a cardiologist because she has a large hole in her heart. A VSD heart murmur. So I did and they told me what to look and watch for warning signs of heart trouble. Wow, I felt so all alone. Like no one knew how I was feeling. Scared, confused and alone. At three months old, Amanda went into congestive heart failure and had to be put on medicines to clear fluid out of her lungs. She then soon became underweight because she wouldn't suck very long before she got real tired. The cardiologist told me that if she doesn't gain weight soon, she has a 90 percent chance of having open heart surgery. Her dad was very kind and helped us with her medical bills.
I felt hopeless and started looking for God. I remembered my supervisor, Frank Clark telling me about Jesus. So I called him and said " I just want to go to church, and I was told Roman Catholic church was the only real church; is that true?" And he said Laurie its something you do in your heart, not in a building." And then he prayed with me on the phone and I asked Jesus in my heart and to be Lord of my life. I got saved in November of 1990. So awesome when I think about it now, how God used my daughter to save me and bring me into a relationship with him. And she NEVER needed the heart surgery. As I kept seeking God, she kept getting better and better! When Frank and I would get a 15 minute break at work, he would read the bible and a little book called My Daily Bread. He is a southern Baptist and he and his wife Linda brought me to church with them. They took me under their wings and mentored me in the Lord for about 3 years until Norton AFB closed and we both got transferred to different stations. It was pretty scarey leaving my friend and mentor. Felt like God let go of my hand. So thankful that they have always kept in touch with me, even till this day. They have been that steady rock in my life, always there and always the same. Love them so much. He has sent me countless books, CDs, literature and gifts. And has always been there to encourage me.
My new station was Luke AFB in Phoenix AZ, we got there in 1993. Amanda had seen her father several times before we left California and I took several pictures of him holding her. But I honestly thought that we would never see him again. I began attending a Weslyan Methodist Church down the street from me and my daughter had several friends in our neighborhood. All was well; I thought. Until one day sometime before Christmas, Amanda asks me for a dad for Christmas. Broke my heart. We had not seen or spoke to her dad since we left California and she was just an infant so I thought she wouldn't even notice him not around. So when I went to church the next time, I asked the women in my group to help me pray that somehow my daughter could have a relationship with her dad. So at this time, I believe she was about 4 1/2 years old. Not long after we prayed at church, a master sergeant at work asked me out to lunch. Not someone I was interested in but I thought it was a free meal anyway. So we were eating at the Sonic when he asked me about my daughters dad. I told him a little bit about him and then he said "I knew him, I grew up with him". So that man went home that evening and must have called her dads family, miles away even, and told them about Amanda. Shortly thereafter, her dad was flying out (in his own private plane) and visiting Amanda. And we made trips to California for her to meet her other grandparents and her half sister. They were all so welcoming and made Amanda feel so special! Her dad has been a part of her life ever since, and even came to Arizona to walk her down the isle when she got married. God is so awesome!
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